1: Don't forget the black people. And the A-rabs. We have to get them, too.

Posted by L'Emmerdeur at 12:29 pm on 12.09.04

2: Asians can stay, so long as they don't try to vote or bring attention to themselves, and look happy while retrieving your dry cleaning.

Posted by Bernard Kerik at 12:42 pm on 12.09.04

3: Exceptionally well-written. Very glad I popped on over.

Posted by Missuh at 12:49 pm on 12.09.04

4: Aw, dude, I was down with you but then you had to go and bust on my main man, Gandalf. That ain't right. I'm gonna have to report you to Elfin Snark Watch.

Posted by JRR Toking at 12:54 pm on 12.09.04

5: "I know that many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no one has ever seen a copy of it. I have finally obtained a copy directly from the Head Homosexual." Bums against the wall boys

Posted by feint at 1:11 pm on 12.09.04

6: You'd think no one outside Saudi Arabia and Iran could make Thatcher's section 28 look relatively moderate.

Posted by Liadnan at 1:39 pm on 12.09.04

7: Meanwhile, in Britain...
That little bastion of opinionated ignorance known as 'Blunkett' is introducing a bill outlawing religious jokes.

Soon, challenging any sort of blind faith will be illegal in the UK, leaving the 'church of the burning yak' to practice its (formerly questionable, when questioning was legal) practices in the middle of any public convenience they choose.
Ideas may not be objected to, questioned, joked about or contradicted as long as people believe in them. Unless it isn't a Christian who made the joke, in which case..

Er..

...Well. It's quite complicated, and there is a full explanation somewhere in the bottom of the filing cabinet. Inside a burned-out tank. Somewhere in the middle east.

Posted by Jacoby at 1:54 pm on 12.09.04

8: L'Emme...and don't forget the Greeks and the Romanians. Bastards!

Posted by Robotnik at 3:03 pm on 12.09.04

9: Actually, the more repressed and oppressive people are, the better perversion pays.

Posted by la depressionada at 3:11 pm on 12.09.04

10: Isn't it funny how it works, La D'?

It's always the moralizing, uptight fuckwad in the suit preaching from a podium in Congress/Parliament who gets caught in an underground S&M house wearing the latex catsuit, feeding from the sphincter of an Asian pre-op teenager while the domme is sewing parakeet bones into his shins.

And we all know scheisse videos were created in Germany and perfected in Japan.

Posted by L'Emmerdeur at 3:19 pm on 12.09.04

11: How Rabelaisian you young turk. (I kid because I love.)

Posted by la depressionada at 4:57 pm on 12.09.04

12: love your tagline

Posted by PAW at 5:40 pm on 12.09.04

13: I always thought that people that are so scared of homosexuals must be repressing those (homosexual)urges that they are so freaked out about. That pisses them off so they take it out on the gays.

I know that sounds kind of psychobabbly but still, I think it's true.

That is what I noticed about the red-stater types. They are always worried about the morality of other people. Worry about your own frigging morality.

I said when the Dickface got back into office that I feel bad for the gays because they were going to be the next target. When you see Karl Rove on tv, talking about the evils of homosexual marriage and homosexuals...well, it doesn't take a rocket scientist.

Oh yeah, and after the gays...Girls, we're next on the list. Mark my words.

Oh yeah, I saw a new nickname for Laura Bush the other day (somewhere on the web). They call her "The First Zombie". I like that.

Posted by G. McFuzz at 7:13 pm on 12.09.04

14: All these repressed types think being gay is a big abomination because it's seen as being outre and exciting. So why is it that most of the gay folks I know are in boring, monagamous relationships? (Which, oddly enough, tend be the healthiest of any of my friends?) That they do everything straight folks do..but fuck members of the same sex? Or one member, so to speak?

I don't get it. Shouldn't everyone have equal opportunity to have mundane relationship problems? To get into petty arguments about why one's a slob and the other's neat? To have crappy breakups and fights about who gets what in the divorce?

Sorry, red-state types, but gays are boring too. Just like you. But maybe that's the problem.

Posted by Sarah at 8:05 pm on 12.09.04

15: Meanwhile....

In the backwater that is New Zealand, http://www.stuff.co.nz/stuff/0,2106,3123548a6160,00.html the "Civil Union Bill" passed throught parliament. Thank god (or whoever you believe in).

The protesting hordes of black-shirted christians, with fists raised in salute was a bit of worry though.

Posted by Minty at 8:15 pm on 12.09.04

16: Go Canada! Go NZ

Minty, are you my 'Minty', if you'll pardon the expression? If you are, thanks so much for a top night out in Wellington. I don't think I've laughed so much or danced so moronically in ages. That last bar was a positive joy to behold.

Posted by Eurotrash at 8:39 pm on 12.09.04

17: Sounds like we could post Robert Mugabe over to the US to give Bush some tips. The two of them share terrifying parallels in terms of the governing a country.

Posted by Chillipip at 12:31 am on 12.10.04

18: I can't liiiiiiiivveeeeee if livin is without you ......

Posted by Kimberley H. at 12:46 am on 12.10.04

19: same old sychophantic drivel as usual I see...

Posted by Trevor at 11:43 am on 12.10.04

20: There simply isn't ENOUGH male on male action in my humble opinion.

Posted by Ari at 1:36 pm on 12.10.04

21: Ah Trevor, you are just too cool for us...you live in Williamsburg no doubt.

Posted by G. McFuzz at 2:42 pm on 12.10.04

22: New tagline, thanks to Trevah.

Posted by Robotnik at 6:00 pm on 12.10.04

23: this emotional paranoia of yours is out of control. is it perhaps because your brain is addled from chronic alcohol abuse? you love to rant above your mother's horrible behavior when drunk yet you seem to be on the same path of self-destruction. can you cite any major examples of what you speak about re gay hatred?

Posted by Pseudo Intellectual at 9:03 pm on 12.10.04

24: Um, did you click the link, Psuedo? I'm a bit tipsy and a lot flu-ey myself, but that seems to qualify as an example/ point of instigation.

P.S. If you're going to be a major asshole, try to see that you've made a bit of sense/clicked the links. No one likes a pseudo-Pseudo Intellectual.

Posted by samantha at 11:21 pm on 12.10.04

25: Fly off the handle much, folks?

Yes, I clicked the link. Some asshole in Alabama files a bill that doesn't have a hope in hell of passing, and you all are fluttering about like the Huns are just over the hill.

Don't you just love that Guardian headline? "President Bush wants 'pro-homosexual' drama banned." When it comes to competing in leaping to conclusions, Guardian headline writers are Olympic champs.

And I still don't know what this meeting with Bush is about. No other paper but the Guardian is mentioning it. All I've been finding at the Alabama papers are editorials saying what a dickhead Gerald Allen is for introducing this dim-witted bill.

Posted by Bill Peschel at 12:59 am on 12.11.04

26: Being an emotionally paranoid alcoholic, I know I'm not worth the paper I'm written on, but I figured we were more 'taking the piss' than 'flying off the handle'. We embrace anger here, and smother it with our love.

But then again, what do I know? Hic.

Posted by Eurotrash at 1:09 am on 12.11.04

27: Just realised I have a new tagline.

Posted by Eurotrash at 1:14 am on 12.11.04

28: Still in the midst of flu-induced delusions myself, so I suppose if I were to assume that :"folks" meant white heterosexual males like Bill P. himself? And not, say, the rest of us who get significantly unequal pay for equal work, as is well-documented.

Posted by samantha at 1:22 am on 12.11.04

29: from where I'm sitting (here in Williamsburg), it's all pretty obvious:

SHE DROVE HER POOR MOTHER TO THE DRINK!

Posted by Trevor at 4:07 am on 12.11.04

30: My mother would have agreed with Trevor.

Nice to see you got your caps lock fixed, Trev. I was worried about you for a moment.

Posted by Eurotrash at 3:16 pm on 12.11.04

31: Nicely put.

Would you believe it, t'was was with those very words I first described my condition to my psychiatrist.

"My problem is that my caps lock is blocked in upper-case lettering" says I
"Tell me about it" says he

Posted by Trevor at 3:54 pm on 12.11.04

32: really good site- keep up the good work!

Posted by mordi at 9:39 am on 12.12.04

33: Oh yes, a newly elected senator from Oklahoma would like to have gays banned from teaching.

Oh yeah, and as for my paranoia about women being next...read about the drugstores that are refusing to fill prescriptions for birth control pills. This is how is starts.

Need someone internal to blame when things go wrong. It's all the fault of them thar homos or liberated wimmens, them thar feminazis.....all them thar blue staters. Don't they know "god hates fags". Oh pseudo just chalk it up to the "emotional paranoia of my chronically-abused alcoholic addled brain" . Woo hoo.

Posted by G. McFuzz at 12:57 pm on 12.12.04

34: Uh, I don't think anything in that story is true.

Posted by CW at 1:46 am on 12.13.04

35: Why is it when gays sleep around, they're immoral and slutty, but if a straight man takes 5 different girls home its "dating?" Hrrrrmff

Posted by LB at 4:02 am on 12.13.04

36: honestly, people like allen must think that homosexuality is like a disease, something you can 'catch'.

stupid a.

Posted by j-a at 5:39 pm on 12.13.04

37: Oh please. I thought we were through with this subject. Gay people should have all the same rights and all the same problems as everyone else, because, guess what, THEY'RE JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE!!!!!

Except most of them I know are somewhat smarter than your average red-stater. Except, gee, I live in a "red state" myself, and it has the biggest gay-friendly city outside of San Francsico in the US . . . so where does that leave us? I think we should just stop differentiating on the basis of sexual preferences and go back to "what have you done for me lately?"

Posted by PrissyNot at 5:14 pm on 12.14.04

38: Great post! As a librarian (although not a public librarian) I must confess that I disguise my agenda to corrupt young minds as 'intellectual freedom'.

Posted by Snooze at 1:28 pm on 12.15.04

39: There's only one....

Posted by Minty at 10:07 pm on 12.16.04

40: I think you should just beat that silly man with feather boas until he's willing to suck cock.

Posted by Sin at 3:06 am on 12.17.04

41: Is this what passes for leftist thought these days? Sad, isn't it.

Posted by Bunnie at 4:02 pm on 12.21.04

42: Oh, for the love of Christ. I'm not a fan of George Bush, being nestled here in the Gay Bay Area and all, but this is just *fiction*. A senator introduces a bill against homosexual drama. This senator is a Republican. He has met with President Bush. Why? Because he's a Republican. He's part of the base. That doesn't mean you get to leap frog to 'our leader wants to burn them gay books!'.

Posted by Diana at 2:35 am on 12.24.04

43: It's such a shame so many net weblogs are hijacked by ageing rednecks, who think posting hateful remarks about black and gay people proves they have a braincell between them

Bile-weary racists and homophobes have nothing better than posting hatred on the net, while they masturbate their wrinkly pink stumps pleasurably in-front of their burning crosses.

HEY, REDNECKS! WAKE UP FROM YOUR ROCKING CHAIRS... THE CONFEDERATES LOST THE AMERICAN CIVIL WAR!!!

GET TOKING, BUBBAS

Posted by Cheech and Thong at 9:26 pm on 12.29.04

44: Cheechy,

I agree. These ageing rednecks need to replace hate with weed.

Let's accept each other's differences, and chill out, like they did in the sixties.

Whatever happened to magic mushroomz???

I wanna party, dudes.......

Posted by Mary The Hippy Chick at 9:40 pm on 12.29.04

45: We need another summer of love.

Maybe the politicians will join in, and tune in, and drop out, when they see what fun the killjoys are missing out on.

Who led the sixties revolution? People with reefers, dudes.

Not the men in grey suits, or the American religious right - God bless 'em, lol

Love and many kisses xxxxxxxxxxx

And lotsa sex

Posted by We Need Another Summer Of Love at 9:46 pm on 12.29.04

46: Anyone got a Rizla???

Posted by Ricky Smoke at 9:48 pm on 12.29.04

47: For medicinal use, lol

Posted by Ricky at 9:50 pm on 12.29.04

48: Liberty caps are cool

Posted by Shazy at 9:53 pm on 12.29.04

49: I am a homosexual man and frankly I think that you have no right to say that the homosexual community is threatening your unborn children. You can't rid the libraries of books on or containing homosexual content either. According to the Bill of Rights EVERYONE has freedom of expression whether it be verbal or written. People who fear and ridicule homosexuals, may they be male or female, really need to try and live a day in the life of a homosexual. We put up with so much crap from homophobic people it isn't funny. You need to check your opinions at the door.

Posted by Jeffrey at 6:38 am on 01.02.05

50: And one more thing, lesbians are gay to so if you are going to hate oen you have to hate them all. It's sexism if not.

Posted by Jeffrey at 6:40 am on 01.02.05

51: Jeffrey, dear boy, I think you have somewhat missed my point. Think "ironic".

Best regards,

ET

Posted by Eurotrash at 3:34 pm on 01.03.05

52: ET, darling, "Jeffrey" is an American -- he doesn't do "ironic".

Posted by Colonel Blimp at 12:29 am on 02.09.06