1: Isn't Dido just a bit too easy a target for your vitriol? She's like a grown-up version of Mandy Moore.

Are you really missing Krucoff that much?

Posted by Uch at 5:18 pm on 04.19.04

2: Fuck no, that woman deserves what she gets. Now if only she WOULD go down with the fucking ship.

Posted by P of P at 6:13 pm on 04.19.04

3: Is it possible that I'm here early? I get where you're coming from with Dido, but couldn't we lump Nora Jones in there, as well? It's like she has a bad song, a decent song, and a good song. And she repeats those songs over and over again . . . well, except for the good song. There's just one of those.

And, dare I say, that this post is almost too British to be understood by 95% of the U.S. population.

Posted by Scott-san at 6:13 pm on 04.19.04

4: "Eventually they marry LAN support technicians and set up home in Kent or Essex and spend Saturday nights down the Orange Tree pub drinking vodka and coke and crying in the loos when their bloke chats up some other slapper."

Okay, what rung in the IT hierarchy does one occupy when they're spending nights in their sister's North Finchley home getting blind drunk on polish vodka & apple juice while having a banger of a time on the playstation with her niece? and what's the corresponding soundtrack?

Posted by krucoff at 6:15 pm on 04.19.04

5: I feel the same way about Tori Amos. We need a reality show where they fight to the death on a tropical island. I'd watch that. (as long as there was no singing, just screaming)

Posted by Kungfukitten at 6:43 pm on 04.19.04

6: Wanna go to the Dido concert with me in June? 7th row orchestra. Close enough to throw shit at her.

Posted by Jellyguy at 7:11 pm on 04.19.04

7: ...Tori Amos is a wonderous human animal with nice legs...hmmmm...& why are all these 'bad' singers female, let's see if we can even it out a bit...

Posted by wow at 7:46 pm on 04.19.04

8: Oh she's alright. Not as good as Kate Bush mind, but then who is frankly? I think you should concentrate your anger on talentless no marks like Emma Bunton or something.

Anyway, 'rah to you. This is so much better than you whinging on and on about fucking chicken stock.

Posted by maccers at 8:54 pm on 04.19.04

9: Bitch, I axed you for a recipe: buttered lentils.

Posted by * at 8:55 pm on 04.19.04

10: DON'T START WITH TORI AMOS. I memorized the entire lyrics set of one of that bitch's albums to please an English major I dated one summer not too long after college. It ended badly - I caught her following me up the Garden State Parkway once, and then she told a friend of my sister's that I'd sent her photographs of a part of my anatomy that had not (and has since not) to my knowledge even been photographed. (Not that people wouldn't pay to see it, but that's beside the point.)

Tori Amos sucks.

And what the fuck is Eurotrash still doing on the ass end of the Atlantic Ocean?

Posted by Sterling at 8:58 pm on 04.19.04

11: I feel the same way about Rush.

Which Tori album was it? Little Earthquakes?

Posted by Lux at 10:00 pm on 04.19.04

12: Don't blame Tori for your mistakes.

Everyone knows you shouldn't go out with English majors until they either

1) get published or
2) get a real job, and are summarily crushed by life.

In fact, listening to and reading Tori's lyrics should have made this abundantly clear.

Alas, I know we must learn these lessons the hard way. I went out with a French girl in college, so I should shut up now.

Posted by Jellyguy at 10:15 pm on 04.19.04

13: Also, English majors should not date other English majors while they are both in the process of getting real jobs and being crushed by life.

Seems obvs, but this is information that could have been brought to my attention YEARS AGO.

Posted by Lux at 10:49 pm on 04.19.04

14: I used to like Dido for about 5 minutes, until all of her songs started sounding the same.

And Tori Amos is capable of singing in a nice voice, but she wheezes. Someone give that woman an inhaler.

Posted by teahouseblossom at 11:15 pm on 04.19.04

15: Saw this and thought of you... You've probably seen and enjoyed already.

http://image.nartbox.com/ecard/swf/040121_dung.swf

Posted by hmmm... at 11:25 pm on 04.19.04

16: The Tori Amos album was "Under the Pink" - released just before I returned to New Jersey, due to a feared indictment in another jurisdiction. (In the American idiom, we call this "Getting out of Dodge".)

The English major in question was two years younger, but three years behind me in school, having taken off a few semesters following repeated unsuccessful suicide attempts and a prolonged (and I suspected, ongoing) struggle with bulimia.

With just a few more personal defects, fate would doubtless have made her a close friend of Maccers' and Eurotrash's.

Posted by Sterling at 12:19 am on 04.20.04

17: Christ. At least it wasn't "Boys for Pele." That's probably what she was listening to when she was stalking you on the parkway.

I have to admit I am a Tori fan, but one should never attempt to listen to her unmedicated.

Posted by Lux at 12:39 am on 04.20.04

18: Buttered Lentils.

50g/20z butter
1 onion, peeled and chopped
2 cloves of garlic, peeled and crushed
Pinch of garam masala
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp turmeric
1/4 tsp chilli powder
1/4 tsp ground cumin
1/4 tsp ground coriander
400g/14oz can of green lentils, drained and washed
1 tbsp double cream

Heat the butter in a saucepan and pop in the onions to soften. Then add the garlic and all the spices and fry for a couple of minutes. Tip in the lentils and add 125ml/5 fl oz of water and cook for five minutes. Take the pan off the heat and stir in the cream. Hey presto. You can serve it with pitta bread, but it's much nicer as an accompaniement to.....

Jubilee Curry.
2tbsp groundnut or olive oil
1 onion peeled and chopped
2 cloves of garlic, peeled and crushed
1 tsp root ginger, peeled and chopped
1 red chillie, de-seeded and fineley chopped
1/4 tsp turmeric
1/2 tsp ground cumin
1/4 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp ground coriander
1/4 tsp salt
2 chicken breasts, skinned and chopped
1/4 tsp garam masala
200ml/7 fl oz of coconut cream

To save time, I plop the onion, garlic, ginger and de-seeded chilli in a food processor and whiz them into finely chopped bits. Then I cook them gently in the oil so the onion softens. Next add all the spices except the garam masala and fry gently for a minute or two. Add the chicken and cook it until you know it won't poison you. Stir in the garam masala and the coconut cream and simmer for about 5 minutes. Serve with the buttered lentils and pilau rice.

Both these receipes come from one of my favourite cook books, Brit Spice, by Manju Malhi.

So there you go, *. And I do recommend making your own garam masala - it makes a hell of a difference and Manju has a dead easy recipe for it.

Now. Back to the hating.......

Posted by eurotrash at 7:14 am on 04.20.04

19: What the hell is "whingeing?"

Posted by anonymous hobbit at 8:28 am on 04.20.04

20: Main Entry: whinge
Pronunciation: 'hwinj, 'winj
Function: intransitive verb
Inflected Form(s): whinged; whing·ing or whinge·ing
Etymology: from (assumed) Middle English, from Old English hwinsian; akin to Old High German winsOn to moan
British : to complain fretfully : WHINE

Posted by eurotrash at 8:36 am on 04.20.04

21: Thank you. I feel very taken care of.

(Pssst, "Old English" is for losers. "Old High German" too, for that matter.)

Posted by anonymous hobbit at 9:15 am on 04.20.04

22: I suppose you Middle Earth dwellers prefer Elvish.

Posted by eurotrash at 9:22 am on 04.20.04

23: Granted, hearing about other people's babies is not enjoyable.

But have you ever been in the delivery room?
*Ducks as the insults fly*

Posted by anonymous hobbit at 10:18 am on 04.20.04

24: All this Tori Amos bashing really isn't cool. Just so you know.

Posted by Scott-san at 10:44 am on 04.20.04

25: Listening to Tori unmedicated? Are you MAD? Navy SEALS banned that from their training regimen because it was too sadistic.

But you have to love her music. Any woman who brands her father as a starfucker in her lyrics is OK in my book.

Posted by Jellyguy at 10:53 am on 04.20.04

26: >What the hell is "whingeing?"

grizzling.

Posted by EB at 11:02 am on 04.20.04

27: >What the hell is "whingeing?"

grizzling.

Posted by EB at 11:02 am on 04.20.04

28: Oh, I'm not bashing Tori. I adore her. Seen her 4 times in concert.

I'm just saying she's intense, so if you're a little... chemically unbalanced (and who isn't, really)... you should proceed with caution.

Posted by Lux at 11:09 am on 04.20.04

29: Good to be back.

Posted by Evil Anonymous Double Poster at 11:12 am on 04.20.04

30: Intense? She's a fruity redhead who bangs piano keys.

Posted by Sterling at 11:14 am on 04.20.04

31: Actually, I have been in the delivery room. I was my sister's birth partner and can therefore claim to be one of the few people who have stared intently at her nether regions for a couple of hours.

Posted by eurotrash at 11:38 am on 04.20.04

32: eurotrash is hotter than the harddrive on a G3

Posted by cows at 11:48 am on 04.20.04

33: given that description, i know alot of "dido girls"

Posted by hubs at 12:27 pm on 04.20.04

34: Thanks for the recipe. And thanks for the conversions to the more appropriate (read: US) measurements. [insert emoticon here if you are one of those shiny-happy precious people. i am not. so fuck emoticons]

Posted by * at 12:46 pm on 04.20.04

35: Regarding your sister, ET, that's not what I've heard.

Dido is cute as hell. I'm not sure what she does for a living, though.

Posted by at 12:59 pm on 04.20.04

36: Hey, that was me.

Posted by sac at 1:00 pm on 04.20.04

37: Oh, thanks gobs, ET. I am scheduled to take my daughter to a Dido concert in the near future, and I had no idea she was the LAN support technician with spotty skin of modern music. I just thought she was a poor relation of Tori Amos, and would have let it go at that.

Maybe I can close my eyes and think of England.

Posted by Bwana from Beantown at 2:05 pm on 04.20.04

38: Oh, thanks gobs, ET. I am scheduled to take my daughter to a Dido concert in the near future, and I had no idea she was the LAN support technician with spotty skin of modern music. I just thought she was a poor relation of Tori Amos, and would have let it go at that.

Maybe I can close my eyes and think of England.

Posted by Bwana from Beantown at 2:14 pm on 04.20.04

39: I thought Courtney Love was the starfucker . . ?

This commenting seems pretty tame. Is it because I'm here, or because ET is in her homeland?

Posted by Scott-san at 2:20 pm on 04.20.04

40: ur using more and more Brit vocabulary since you went back home!

Posted by Franz at 2:46 pm on 04.20.04

41: Think there's a connection between such recipes and the shattered toilets in Hoboken?

Needs minty pickled sour sauce.

Posted by Jellyguy at 3:07 pm on 04.20.04

42: Ta dah!
Also, Jellyguy is actually a 14 yr. old.
Who knew? !?

Posted by Evil Anonymous Double Poster at 4:08 pm on 04.20.04

43: All of this commenting and nobody has taken the time to mention that Hugh Grant may not, in fact, be all that discriminating.

Posted by cw at 4:39 pm on 04.20.04

44: C-dub's got a point there. Don't know how that moment slipped out of my pop-culture memory banks.

Posted by Scott-san at 4:44 pm on 04.20.04

45: Scott-san: the "starfucker, just like my daddy" lyric is from the song Professional Widow, which is rumored to be about Courtney.

Posted by Lux at 5:01 pm on 04.20.04

46: Now you know the real behind Aeneas' hasty departure.

Posted by sean at 6:02 pm on 04.20.04

47: [reason]

Posted by sean at 6:03 pm on 04.20.04

48: I'm with ya, Lux.

Posted by Scott-san at 6:03 pm on 04.20.04

49: Hmmm, new trivia to me. I just assumed it was about her own dad, like a number of other songs she's written.

And, yes, I am a 14 year old girl with pink nail polish and braces.

Posted by Jellyguy at 7:11 pm on 04.20.04

50: With an Oedipal complex.

Posted by Lux at 9:36 pm on 04.20.04

51: My girlfreind likes Dido. So do I, kinda.

But then again I like Saxon. And listen to stuff like Marshall Tucker Band, and Hot Tuna unironically. And I always get crushes on the mousey admin. support girl/quiet girl who runs the produce section etc. so I may be the wrong source.

Posted by jonmc at 10:43 am on 04.21.04

52: you all suck. just skimming this string of comments has made me throw up in my mouth three times, and i am on so much dilaudid right now that, frankly, i am quite surprised that my respiratory system, let alone my regurgitative capability, is functioning properly. never mention tori amos again, please *plechhhghhh* damn, there i go again. i've tried to spike her paxil with cyanide on more than one occasion, but damn if that wily bitch doesn't have a nose for almonds.

Posted by your dealer at 11:25 am on 04.21.04

53: Indeed.

Posted by Jellyguy at 12:18 pm on 04.21.04

54: and yet still no one has asked what happened to the "l' in dido....

Posted by EB at 11:54 pm on 04.21.04

55: No-one? Re-boots? Whinge? Slapper? Bloke? Loo? Willesden? Fulham? Petrol? Mate??? English really is a foreign language.

Posted by Michael at 3:15 pm on 04.22.04

56: Too many teardrops for one heart to be cryin'
Too many teardrops for one heart to carry on
You're way on top now
Since you left me
You're always laughin'
Way down at me
But watch out now
I'm gonna get there
We'll be together
For just a little while
And then I'm gonna put you
Way down here
And you'll start cryin'
Ninety-six tears
Cry
Cry

Posted by ? at 4:15 pm on 04.22.04

57: Love
Love will keep us together
Think of me babe whenever
Some sweet girl comes walking along, singing a song
Don't look around, you just have to be strong and
Stop
(Stop!)
'Cause I really love you
Stop
(Stop!)
I've been thinking of you
Look in your heart and let love keep us together
Whenever

Posted by C&T at 3:19 am on 04.23.04

58: I've been watching you now, I've been caught in these hours
Days are turnin' to nights, I live where there's no, no room for strangers
When I see you again, will you still feel the same way?
I understand that in your eyes, I can't get nothing right
Chorus:
All day - all night - make it happen - make me feel alright
All day - all night - make it happen - make me feel alright
Oh yeah
When I see you walk by, turn my head, wanna break down
I've been livin' alone, I've been livin' a lie, I get so scared of my fears
There's this place in my life, for just one time or maybe forever
I understand it's in your eyes, I can't get nothing right
(chorus)
(Solo)
I've been watching you now, and I've been livin' in a daydream
It's that I miss you so, can't think of words, I break down, I've been lonely
When I see you again, will you still feel the same way?
I understand that in your eyes, I can't do nothing right
(chorus repeats 2x)
All day, make it happen - alright - make it happen - yeah
Make it happen, yeah yeah

Posted by where's ET? at 10:22 am on 04.23.04

59: Ah, ah, ah , ah... you're killing me! Thanks for that ;-)

Posted by Amie at 3:44 pm on 04.23.04

60: Long ago, and oh so far away
I fell in love with you before the second show.
Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear
But your not really here
It's just the radio.

Don't you remember you told me you loved me baby?
Said you'd be coming back this way again baby.
Baby baby baby baby oh, baby
I love you.
I really do.

Posted by Tommy Boy at 3:44 am on 04.24.04

61: Talking smack about how certain women likes Dido, describing them down to weight and potential marriage candidates... Who the fuck do you think you are?

Get off your high horses you pathetic never-was

Posted by Mick at 6:12 pm on 04.24.04

62: oy! i leave for a week and this is what i come back to? ET get thyself back to the US of A and return to your daily grousing. (por favor.)

Posted by snowy at 3:34 am on 04.25.04

63: "And, dare I say, that this post is almost too British to be understood by 95% of the U.S. population."

And 95% of the World's good literature wasn't wrote by or for Americans with small vocabularies, and brains to match. Expand your cranium!

Posted by Amie at 7:13 am on 04.25.04

64: Erm, that came out wrong... errr, sorry :( I didn't mean anything against Americans. Oops. Don't bet me! ;-P

Posted by Amie at 4:05 pm on 04.25.04

65: dido - the name alone is worthy of any amount of vitriol. and where is eurotrash now - still in london? getting confused. losing track. need cliffnotes.

Posted by j-a at 4:03 am on 04.26.04

66: Don't worry Amie, I won't bet you.

Posted by Papa Hemingway at 7:29 am on 04.26.04

67: Saxon, Jonmc??
Oh good lord...

Posted by Lepus at 1:43 pm on 04.26.04

68: Denim & Leather, all run together, It was you who set the spriit free....


Congratulatios, lepus, you have met the least hip person in New York City. Now back to the jams:

Just! Let! Me! Rock!

Posted by jonmc at 4:23 pm on 04.26.04

69: I'm applying for a LAN support job and am nothing like the people you have described. Does that mean I have no chance of getting it? I hope not as I really want it.

Its got to be better than a being a civil servant where you are treated like shit by both the government and the people you are trying to help.

Posted by Cheekysquirrel at 1:30 pm on 04.27.04

70: Yeah... well... I like tori, call me a looser, but at least she has some musical talent, unlike Brittney Spears who cant sing OR play an instrament OR write music. Tori can at least play piano, whether or not you like her voice.

Posted by Gabriella at 3:26 am on 06.04.04